Sometimes you just need a little push. Your game is good, you’re plenty sharp as a guy, but you know there are just certain things you could be doing right now that would not only make your own life a little more shining and rich, but would draw females toward you in that effortless way you’ve always wanted. These aren’t really secrets–successful guys (successful people, for that matter) do these things on a consistent basis, but everyone starts somewhere. So here are 5 things (with another 5 tomorrow) you can start doing today (just pick one of them, don’t over-do it) that will instantly and permenantly up your cachet in a lasting, legitimate way.

And this works for guys who already have girls, too. Improving yourself and becoming more attractive (in the original sense of attractive, ie., that you attract others towards you) is something you should probably be doing your whole damn life, not just in that ferocious period where you’re trying to win a girl (or several). Being ‘effortlessly good’ takes work, but it’s good work, so read on for 5 things you can do, pick one of them, and start.

10. Learn another language but keep it damn interesting with good movies.

Read Tim Ferris’s post on the subject and start small. Pick a language that’s useful to you (something like Spanish, French, Mandarin, Arabic), and figure out the language books that get recommended the most. Use amazon for that. Pick up one, and then use it as an excuse to watch a ton of movies in that language (obviously subtitled in English, but if you work hard for a few months you might start watching stuff in its original language–always subtitled.) Italian and French are the best candidates for this based solely on cinema alone. Best of all, this ties into #9:

9. Pick a cultural area and get heavily accquainted with it.

Like Italian film. Don’t do this lightly and don’t fake it. Read a couple of books on the subject and watch what you can. You gotta branch out. Here are a few to try, if you’re feeling lost:

• Any major part of art history
• Any major literary movement (try reading 3 victorian novels and a light, fun non-fiction book on the period. It’ll do wonders for the next time you have to explain why your moral system isn’t crazy, which is perfect when you’re chasing 2, 3, 4 girls at once…)
• Music below the surface (pick anything here: early or late reggae, delta blues, balkan brass bands… it’s limitless)

Whatever you choose will lead you to future things. When you’re interested in stuff, it shows. Keep positive, stay curious, and people will want to know more.

8. Travel Alone

Try a couple of weeks entirely alone through a foreign country. I don’t need to explain anything else about why this is good for you becoming a more attractive, desireable guy, but if you want to make a good impression you really should have the capacity to pull this off. It speaks volumes about your capacity elsewhere.

7. Cook, for the love of God

Don’t be intimidated by other dudes who are experts in one cuisine or another, naysayers who call you elitist, or those who hold their enjoyment of food as a kind of snobbery above everyone else. We all gotta eat 3 times a day, so it’s one area you can improve yourself in without putting yourself out too much. Keep it positive and buy something like Mark Bittman’s How to Cook Everything. Maybe throw in Michael Pollan’s In Defense of Food so you can explain why you’re spending so much more time cooking these days (not that it should really be necessary). Start simple and fresh. Don’t go nuts making 4-course heavy french meals for your friends when all you gotta do is work from simplicity.

6. Work–yeah, actually work on–your own sense of curiosity.

This is hard. This is real hard. But it makes all the difference in how much input you get into your brain from other people, and it does a billion other things for you–it fills you with information, with stories, tales, anecdotes, and emptathy for others, understanding, and experience. When you develop (and you do have to develop it, only a select few are born with it naturally) this ability to be curious in other people, to put the initial unknowingness on hold at the beginning and treat every person you meet like they have a prize-winning novel-worthy story inside of them, you’ll be on a step towards making yourself a great person too.

And not to mention how flat-out attractive this makes you. Again, in the traditional sense of the word. People are attracted towards people like this, for obvious reasons. Read this article about Studs Terkel. Now I doubt any of us could match his insane enthusiasm for other people, but if you can capture just 5% of what he got from his fellow man you will be a lucky dude indeed, in every sense of the word.

Try 5 more tomorrow!